Pilfer Academy: A School So Bad It's Criminal

Gr 5–7—George has five siblings, and he seems to be the one who is always in trouble. His life is totally turned upside down the day he gets kidnapped. His kidnappers, Strongarm and Ballyrag, take him off to a school called Pilfer Academy, where the students are taught the fine art of thievery. George becomes a model student and begins to make friends, but after the midterm exams, he realizes that stealing things makes him feel awful. In an attempt to get expelled, he is sent to the dreaded whirlyblerg. Lucky for him, he gets a second chance to redeem himself, and instead of becoming a thief, he plans and plots a way to escape so he can return home to his family. This middle grade novel offers some humor as Ballyrag spouts one malapropism after another. The descriptions of the lavishness of the school and the bounty of the food in the cafeteria are highly entertaining. Yet the story does not ring true, especially at the end with the speed of George's great escape.